Rescued in Chennai

By the time I arrived in Chennai I felt my love affair with India was well and truly over. I'd just 'celebrated' my fifth month anniversary in the country and lets just say there weren't any signs of party hats, poppers or cake - I was O.V.E.R it. I was sick of the smell, the filth, the food constantly being stared at, the comments, the hassle. Most unlike me. I love India. Always have but too much of a good thing and all that and five months in a long time.

My gorgeous friend Claire Humphries (nee Glennane) told me before I left that if I got into trouble/homesick/fed-up that I should just chuck money at the problem and switch on the TV to watch News 24. At the time I didn't really imagine I'd have to use her advice so I neatly filed it into the deepest darkest corner of my brain. Funny how the little things pop into your head sometimes - I was just about to scream blue murder at a rickshaw driver for 'accidentally' brushing his dirty, filthy little hand on my breast as he 'helped' me with my rucksack when Claire's words of advice rang in my ears. I need to get out of India, I need to be where others (ie rickshaw drivers) aren't. I need to escape and quickly. Before I knew where I was there I am sitting with Charlie and Greg, who had flown down to Chennai to save me from myself, poring through LP looking for a five star hotel.

OH. MY. GOD. It was sheer luxury. A large room, double bed, clean white sheets, mini bar, room service, sat tv, air con....pool, bar, restaurant. Let me put this into context for you - I haven't slept directly on bed linen for eight months (sarongs are neatly placed on every bed I sleep on for fear of bed bugs or any other kind of skin related disease), nor has my foot directly touched any floors for fear of some sort of fungal infection. I hadn't watched TV in over three months and my mild obsession for my hand anti bacteria sanitiser was out of control.

After a few nights at the Ambassador, Greg got a bit carried away and tried to pursued us to stay at the Taj Connemara 'Taj me up'...very plush hotel who I think would've laughed if we'd turned up with in our 'traaaaveller' get up ruck sacks. We had to reign him in and thankfully we all settled for a slap up meal there instead. Ahhhhh salmon steaks, cheesy mash potato, asparagus, artichokes...I nearly wept with joy at the taste senstaions.

So that's what we did for a week - luxury all the way. Greg and Charlie stayed in a 'daddy' suite - I naturally gate crashed. We watched sat tv, crappy films and ordered room service. I developed a mild obsession for tuna, mayo, cheese sarnies and chips...after 5 months chili alo gobi has lost its appeal and if I see another illidy (rice cake) I will cry. I ordered breakfast in bed, lay by the pool and generally did nothing...oh and I watched News 24 - a lot. And I mean a lot!!!